Qi Yubai had already left.
In the spacious private room, only Lanyin remained.
The surroundings were quiet. Lanyin was still in a dazed stupor. If not for the lingering warmth on her wrist that did not belong to her, and the faint scent of ebony agarwood still drifting through the room, she would have almost thought she had been dreaming—an absurd dream so unbelievable that no one would believe it even if she spoke of it.
Yet, this was no dream.
Everything was real.
Thinking about what Qi Yubai had said to her, his honesty, his confession, and… the words he left before leaving—
“Earlier, I was reckless, but you will have to get used to it. I like you, and I want to be close to you. This is instinct, even I cannot control it.”
Her face flushed red again, and her heart pounded like a drum.
Lanyin raised her hand to cover her face, but as soon as her fingertips touched her skin, they trembled slightly—too hot, so hot that it made her heart shudder. Knowing the reason behind it, she quickly turned and walked toward the stand by the window where clear water was placed. She hurried over, intending to splash her face with cold water, but as she looked down, she caught sight of her reflection in the water.
The calm surface mirrored a face filled with bashfulness, the corners of her brows and eyes betraying an undeniable spring-like softness.
If she went out looking like this with Qi Yubai, anyone would be able to guess what had just happened. Their imaginations would surely run wild.
She didn’t dare to look at herself in the water and quickly shut her eyes. Water splashed over her face in a rush, and Lanyin thought this would help extinguish the heat in her heart. Yet, no matter how hard she tried to suppress her thoughts, her mind refused to obey. The moment she closed her eyes, those words and that figure only became clearer.
Her mind was filled with images of Qi Yubai.
The way he smiled, the way he gazed at her from beneath his lowered lashes, the way his black eyes gleamed as he looked at her—so bright, like the most dazzling stars in the night sky…
In the past, whenever she thought of him, her heart was filled with sorrow and panic. She feared falling deeper, feared being discovered. But now, when she thought of him—
Lanyin bit her lip, unable to describe her current emotions. There was joy, there was warmth, there was happiness, and even… a hint of sweetness. It was like tasting a spoonful of the finest honey, spreading a lingering sweetness in her heart.
But beyond these emotions, there was still worry. There was still unease.
She had once experienced a failed marriage and had never considered stepping into another.
Lanyin knew exactly what kind of person she was.
When it came to managing a household and handling affairs, she was more than capable. But to act as other women did, to be delicate and gentle with her husband—she neither knew how nor was accustomed to it. She had been hardened since childhood, and many things that came naturally to other women were things she could never seem to learn.
Her temperament was not the best either.
She always seemed too distant about many things. To put it nicely, she was rational. To put it bluntly, she was cold. She was used to planning, used to finding the most advantageous position for herself even in the worst circumstances.
The things Xiao Ye once reproached her for were not entirely wrong.
She was indeed selfish. She was indeed indifferent. She feared that if Qi Yubai ever saw the real her, he would regret it.
Moreover, even if they were in love now, what would happen when they spent every day together in the future? When all their flaws and shortcomings came to light, would the joy they felt now turn into mutual resentment?
At this thought, the surging emotions in Lanyin’s heart slowly faded, cooling little by little, like a grand flame suddenly doused by a bucket of ice water—extinguished, leaving only wisps of smoke.
The water in the basin had long been disturbed, its surface rippling, blurring her reflection. But Lanyin thought that by now, the shyness and warmth on her face must have already disappeared.
That was for the best.
At least no one would be able to see through her.
This was who she was. Even if she could be troubled by love and emotions, she would quickly regain her clarity.
But for some reason—
For the first time, Lanyin felt that her rationality was pathetic, even pitiful.
The surroundings were silent. The heat lingering on her body had completely dissipated, and her once-racing heartbeat had returned to calm. Lanyin propped both hands against the washbasin, stood in silence for a moment, then straightened up and carefully wiped her face with a handkerchief.
“Master?”
With a creak, the door was pushed open from the outside. It was Shi Yu, who had heard movement inside and stepped in. Seeing Lanyin standing with her back turned, she asked curiously, “What are you doing here?”
By now, Lanyin had returned to normal. Seeing Shi Yu enter, she merely said lightly, “Go to the back courtyard and bring me my rouge and powder. I need to redo my makeup.” Earlier, caught up in the turmoil of her emotions, she had forgotten that she was still wearing makeup. Fortunately, her skin was fair, and she had never been in the habit of applying heavy powder. Even in full makeup, she had only drawn her brows and tinted her lips. The stone black ink she used came from Lingnan and was not easily smudged by water. But Lanyin was still concerned about her appearance and sent Shi Yu to fetch her cosmetics. It would also give her a little more time to settle her emotions.
Though Shi Yu found it odd, she did not ask further. She simply responded softly and left.
About two quarters of an hour later, Lanyin had finished reapplying her makeup, and her emotions had finally calmed. She asked Shi Yu a few questions about the situation below, but instead of letting her follow, she headed alone toward the private room where the Old Madam Qi and the others were gathered. Even before she reached the door, she could hear laughter and lively chatter inside. Thinking about a certain someone also being there, Lanyin clenched her hand tightly before stepping forward.
As footsteps sounded at the doorway, Old Madam Qi turned to look. Seeing Lanyin arrive so late, she did not scold her but merely smiled and asked, “Why are you only back now? Were things too busy?”
Lanyin followed along with her words and replied, “There were some matters that took up a bit of time.” She spoke without the slightest change in expression. Just as she was about to step inside, her gaze met Qi Yubai’s across the room.
He was seated directly facing the entrance. When he saw her enter, he lifted his eyes and smiled at her.
With no one noticing, he made no effort to conceal it.
Qi Yubai’s eyes were deep black, naturally shaped into a pair of indifferent phoenix eyes. When he wasn’t smiling, he exuded an air of noble detachment. But when he did smile, his gaze was as soft as spring blossoms in full bloom—tender, lingering…
Lanyin’s heartbeat, which had just calmed down, was once again easily shattered.
Her heart pounded wildly.
One foot had already stepped into the room, but the other remained outside. Her unusual behavior immediately caught the attention of those inside. Old Madam Qi was the first to frown. She motioned for Yanhuan to help her up and asked with concern, “What’s wrong? You seem a little off today.”
Her voice carried worry, and the other two elderly madams also turned their eyes toward Lanyin with expressions of concern.
Hearing Old Madam Qi’s voice, Lanyin finally snapped back to her senses. She quickly steadied herself and, seeing the concern on their faces, lowered her gaze and explained, “Perhaps I haven’t been resting well these past few days.”
As she spoke, she deliberately avoided looking at Qi Yubai. She feared that if she saw him again, her composure would crumble.
Lanyin felt helpless. She had lived two lifetimes, yet no one had ever made her so flustered before.
Yanhuan came over to support her, and Lanyin did not refuse, allowing herself to be led to sit beside Old Madam Qi. As she sat down, she felt a wave of relief—thankfully, she wasn’t seated next to Qi Yubai. She could hardly imagine what would happen if she had to sit beside him right now. His every move would surely disturb her thoughts and shake her peace.
At that point, she would truly be unable to explain herself.
As soon as she sat down, Old Madam Qi took her hand and sighed. “It’s no wonder you can’t get proper rest in a place like this. If I had known the conditions were like this, I never would have agreed to let you stay here in the first place!”
She was genuinely distressed, holding Lanyin’s hand as she spoke with exasperation. Then, without allowing any room for protest, she added, “Tonight, go back home to rest. No matter how hard you push yourself, you can’t risk your health. Look at you—you’ve grown thinner from exhaustion. I’ll have Yanhuan instruct the kitchen to prepare a few nourishing dishes for you. You need to take care of yourself.”
Lanyin opened her mouth to refuse.
At a time like this, how could she dare to go home? She had yet to sort out her own feelings and had no way of facing Qi Yubai. But Old Madam Qi did not give her the chance to refuse, and Qi Yubai, sitting across from her, was also watching her. Thinking of what he had said earlier, Lanyin was afraid that if she didn’t agree, Qi Yubai would simply stay behind.
If he stayed, she wouldn’t be able to handle it…
Going home at least meant being surrounded by people.
Besides, she truly wanted to know—when had he started liking her? And why?
“Rest assured, I will return home tonight.” Thinking of something, Lanyin added, “But today has been busy at the shop, so I may return late. There’s no need to wait for me for dinner.”
She wasn’t making excuses.
Old Madam Qi understood. With such a grand opening downstairs, as the owner, it wouldn’t do for her to leave early on the first day. She didn’t insist, only holding Lanyin’s hand and repeatedly reminding her, “Make sure you eat something tonight. Don’t get so caught up in work that you forget.”
Seeing the unhidden concern on her face, Lanyin’s heart softened, yet there was also an ache.
She truly didn’t deserve such kindness from them. The warmth in her heart carried a hint of sourness, even making her nose sting, but she dared not let it show. Suppressing the waves of emotion within her, she responded in a hushed voice.
“You treat Yinyin even better than Jingyuan,” Old Madam Feng commented with a smile, watching their exchange.
Old Madam Qi didn’t refute her. Instead, she lifted her chin proudly and said, “My girl is both obedient and filial. Of course, she pleases me more than that grandson of mine, who only knows how to make me angry.”
Hearing this, Old Madam Feng glared at her in exasperation. “That’s a statement begging for a beating. Look around all of Bianjing—who is more filial and well-behaved than Jingyuan? If you think he isn’t good enough, why not trade him for my little troublemaker?”
“You’d be willing?” Old Madam Qi teased with a laugh.
Old Madam Feng huffed. “Why wouldn’t I? Just looking at that rascal makes my blood pressure rise.”
Old Madam Ji also joined in with a few remarks, and the room was soon filled with lively laughter.
As Lanyin watched them, she couldn’t help but wonder what they had been like in their younger years—vibrant, spirited.
A few close friends, laughing and chatting without restraint. Perhaps even riding horses and drinking together…
It was such an ordinary thing, yet Lanyin had never experienced it. Perhaps, when she was very young, she had. Back then, Gu Qing had not gone missing, and she had still been the beloved young mistress of the Changxing Marquis Manor, cherished beyond measure. She had been good-natured and held a high status, making her popular among all the children of Lin’an.
She remembered clinging to her father when she was little, begging him to take her riding. He had laughed and promised that once the mares at Yanmen Pass foaled the following year, he would bring her a young horse.
Later, he had kept his word and sent her a colt.
But she never rode again.
She had put away her carefree laughter, lived strictly by the rules, and never did anything out of line again.
Thinking back to these memories, a faint melancholy swept through her heart. A soft clinking sound of jade against porcelain brought her back to the present. She lowered her gaze and saw that an extra plate of freshly peeled, pitted lychees had appeared before her. A delicate silver hairpin rested atop them, placed there with care.
Lanyin paused.
The retreating hand was long and strong, with a string of prayer beads around the wrist. Beneath them, a ruyi tassel swayed gently in the air.
Even without looking, she knew who it was.
Her fingers tightened, a tremor flickering through her heart. In the end, she couldn’t resist lifting her gaze.
Qi Yubai sat in the shadowed light, his features appearing even more gentle in the dim glow. Seeing her look over, his dark eyes rippled with a faint glimmer, like water reflecting the moon.
He said nothing, only watching her with warmth in his gaze.
The melancholy in Lanyin’s heart suddenly disappeared, and in its place, a soft flutter of emotion surfaced once more.
No one else noticed their silent exchange, and Old Madam Qi remained unaware. However, when she saw the plate of lychees in front of Lanyin, she smiled and said, “Eat more. Your grandmothers and I tried them earlier—they’re quite sweet.”