【If you wanted to stay in a hotel, you would have gone last night.】
【I guess tonight you’re still planning to just make do at the bar!】
That’s right, she guessed correctly.
Chen Kuang thought.
He just didn’t want to go stay in a hotel, could even say, afraid of staying in a hotel.
Other people always praised him as smart and capable, holding up a whole sky by himself, young and promising.
There were also people who said he was arrogant, felt he was bragging and acting awesome, groundlessly jealous of him.
Only he himself knew, he wasn’t at all that kind of divine person others spoke of.
Grinding down over these years, he became a coward, afraid of this, afraid of that, yet ashamed to expose himself.
Afraid of staying in a hotel, afraid of going to the hospital, even more afraid of the tears others shed out of pity for him.
When he was in university, his father was hospitalized, the whole family tensed up their scalps, tugging back and forth with a small little cancer.
His dormitory was a full eighteen kilometers from the hospital, at that time he especially wished he could have one more bit of money, find a small inn near the hospital for him and his mother to short-term stay, save the breath used running back and forth for the hospital room instead.
But there wasn’t, he didn’t even have one extra yuan.
Only an old bicycle going back and forth thirty-six kilometers every day, just like that, rode for two years.
Later he earned a lot of money, still couldn’t cut ties with the hospital.
He was still tugging back and forth with that small little cancer, and the mother originally on this side of the rope, moved to the other side of the rope.
This time he had money, so he stayed in the hotel closest to the hospital, saved the energy spent on the road, yet still couldn’t win this tug-of-war.
One after another sitting in the hotel room, wishing to tear the test result sheet in their hands into shreds, that scene became a nightmare that wouldn’t disperse.
The hotel room’s decor, smell, even the neat white bed sheets made him nauseous.
By comparison, he’d rather just slump over on the bar table and make do sleeping for one night.
He was fragile, inexplicable, also hypocritical.
The moment all this was exposed by Qiao Ling in just one sentence, the layer of dead bark in his body that just barely protected his face fell down with a crackling sound.
The longer the contact time, there would always be people by his side who caught a glimpse of his past.
But don’t know why, he didn’t really hope that person would be Qiao Ling, yet against expectations it was her who first sensed his weakness.
【You have a fever?】
【Maybe.】
The word “illness” was a blood-red, blood-red lesson in his life’s dictionary.
That’s right, he was sick, hadn’t been sick for many years already.
But he didn’t want to admit it.
Even if he was sick, he still wouldn’t admit he was sick himself, didn’t know what he was fighting against.
He was a coward, he was afraid of repeating his parents’ old path.
After all, their illnesses also started from very small, very small, small to the point they were brushed past in half a sentence symptoms.
Actually, he felt living wasn’t very meaningful anymore, this past year he’d been spending the days like half-human half-ghost.
But don’t know why, the moment Qiao Ling said he was sick, a rebellious feeling rushed out from the bottom of Chen Kuang’s heart.
Absolutely wouldn’t admit it in front of her.
He was just such a cowardly, inexplicable, hypocritical person.
Chen Kuang hunched his back, curled his chest and abdomen, squatted by the lake in the dreamscape, staring at the reflection on the lake surface of the girl’s appearance as she cried.
Why must you shed tears for a person like this.
Stop crying already.
Qiao Jing said before, you’re the spoiled precious cub held up in the family’s hands.
Count it all on me, it’s my fault, all right?
………
Chen Kuang moved his fingers a little, the pad of his finger rubbing against a patch of slippery warm heat.
He lifted his eyelids that were stuck together, the heavy line of sight little by little regaining clarity, focusing on the girl’s brows and eyes in front of him.
In his line of sight, Qiao Ling, face red, didn’t move at all.
Chen Kuang’s whole body ached, his eyes lowered down, staring at his own five fingers holding onto the back of her hand.
She was holding an electronic thermometer, because of nervousness gripping it so hard that her knuckles turned white.
In an extremely quiet atmosphere, the two of them suddenly without warning unfolded into a noisy stare-down.
Neither spoke, yet in their eyes there wasn’t calmness.
When this kind of silent pulling was about to reach the critical point, the thermometer in Qiao Ling’s hand very tactfully let out a beep-beep sound.
Qiao Ling took a look and got a fright, raised it up to show him: “Even after taking fever medicine it’s still thirty-eight point five, and you’re still saying you’re fine.”
“You’re practically turning into a furnace.”
Chen Kuang glanced at that number, slowly released his grip on her hand.
When the soft feeling disappeared, his fingertip reflexively jumped once with a brief itch.
“Sorry.”
Again using one word to answer many things.
Qiao Ling lowered her eyes and blinked, her heart all jumbled up.
Was it apologizing for troubling her because he was sick, or apologizing for while sleeping suddenly inexplicably touching her hand…
Really hate this kind of person who doesn’t speak things clearly!
Qiao Ling put away the thermometer, took out an ice towel, folded it and placed it on his forehead.
Chen Kuang’s gaze carried some hesitation, wanting to reach out to do it himself but stopping midway in the air, clearly not used to being taken care of by others.
“How long did I sleep?”
After being helped through the front door by her, after taking one fever-reducing pill, he had completely lost consciousness.
She squatted by the side of the sofa bed, estimating: “Mm… about an hour.”
Chen Kuang was a little surprised.
He had thought he slept for a long time.
The two of them faced each other in silence for a while.
It seemed both were hesitating whether or not to say something, because of the somewhat out-of-control confrontation at the door an hour ago.
Qiao Ling caught sight of Chen Kuang’s Adam’s apple moving slightly, noticing his wanting to speak but holding back, nervously took the initiative: “Do you want to drink water?”
Chen Kuang gave an “Mm,” propped himself up and half-sat up.
She poured a glass of water and handed it to him, half-lowering her gaze, staring at his Adam’s apple as he drank water slowly moving up and down, making her heartbeat speed up.
When a person panics, they tend to babble, using talking to cover up the fact their heart is in chaos.
“Uh, that, it’s just… I…”
Chen Kuang paused his drinking movement, the sound muffled from his throat finally no longer dry, the post-fever voice even more pleasant to hear: “Mm?”
Even though it was just one word, it carried a kind of patience, letting her know he would listen to her slowly speak.
Qiao Ling’s lips parted slightly, met his gaze for a second, then lowered her head again, “Sorry.”
“Just now, to you… I lost my temper.”
And also cried, cried while losing her temper, wuwu, really embarrassing ah.
Now it’s great, before there’s even a single stroke of character in the eight characters [八字没一撇: idiom meaning ‘before things have even begun or taken shape’], already letting him think she’s an unreasonable, willful woman.
Chen Kuang saw her lowering her head like a little girl who had committed a huge mistake, his brows moved slightly, set down the cup, “I already forgot.”
Qiao Ling raised her head, blinking.
Mm?
Chen Kuang looked at her, hinting at a certain scene from before, bringing up old words again: “Didn’t I say before, as long as you say sorry.”
“The words you regret saying, I’ll treat it as if I never heard them.”
Qiao Ling’s cheeks flushed, awkwardly said: “This rule, turns out it’s always effective?”
“If you need it.” He took down the ice towel, the damp black curls slightly tangled, giving off a kind of messy, sickly handsomeness.
Qiao Ling buried her head even lower, hiding the corners of her lips that were about to lift up past her ears.
This person, always saying such teasing words with a cold face, really hateful.
Chen Kuang sat on the sofa, while she was half-squatting, looking up the first thing she saw was the area of his crotch — this kind of high-low height position always made people feel especially awkward. He unconsciously leaned back a little, lightly coughed once.
After taking the fever medicine, that one hour of sleep just now made him sweat quite a bit, now already feeling much more comfortable than before.
Chen Kuang opened his mouth and re-said the words he hadn’t made clear just now: “Let me explain.”
Qiao Ling raised her head, “Hm?”
Chen Kuang’s lip line pressed down slightly, his chin pointed at the lazy sofa next to him, “Don’t squat, go sit.”
Only then did she realize she had been squatting beside him all along, hurriedly stood up, dragging her leg that was already going numb to sit to the side.
“Explain what?”
“It was only after I refused your suggestion that I found out the bar’s lounge couldn’t be stayed in.” he said.
Qiao Ling sorted out her thoughts for a moment, so what he meant wasn’t that he would rather have nowhere to sleep than accept her offer.
She rubbed her nose, feeling a bit unsure what to say, but the knot that had formed in her heart seemed to suddenly all loosen.
Really unwilling, just because of this one sentence from him, her heart was already blooming again.
“I refused you not because I dislike you.” Chen Kuang’s hands hung down in the space between his crossed legs, “I thought I didn’t need to say it so clearly.”
“Qiao Ling, I don’t know how you get along with other male friends.”
He clearly told her: “But with me, even if we’re the best of friends, there’s a difference between men and women. I can’t casually sleep over at a girl’s house.”
Qiao Ling’s heartbeat dropped by a beat again, like a little rabbit’s ears drooping down all of a sudden.
Oh, so this was rejecting her again, huh.
“You’re not casually sleeping at my house right now.” she muttered.
Chen Kuang paused, seeming like he didn’t quite understand.
Qiao Ling gritted her teeth, simply stood up and sat at the edge of the sofa bed, even closer to him.
She propped her hands on the sofa and leaned over, Chen Kuang’s expression didn’t change, but his Adam’s apple pressed down slightly.
“You’re a patient being taken in by me right now.” Qiao Ling smiled, eyes bending out with confidence: “You’re all alone in Binyang, can’t stay at the apartment or the bar, don’t like going to hotels, and renting another place takes time to find.”
“Chen Kuang, right now only I can help you, isn’t that right.”
Chen Kuang’s brows slightly furrowed, like he wasn’t willing to lose in this kind of topic to a girl so much younger than himself.
“I can go find your brother to help, at least he’s a man.”
Qiao Ling: “He’s a man, yes, but right now he still sees you as a love rival.”
“……”
“But he’s my boss.”
Qiao Ling sighed, hugging her arms, simply acted shameless, domineeringly deciding: “This sofa bed at my house, you’ve already slept on it twice, what’s a few more nights. For the days you’re sick, just stay here.”
“Wouldn’t it be good to get better earlier and go back to work earlier?”
“Even if it’s your bottom line, you’ve already broken it.”
“Are you afraid of owing me a favor?”
Chen Kuang was silent for a few seconds, finally lowered his gaze, his chest that was puffed up took in a breath.
Like a kind of symbol of conceding.
“I’ll pay you like it’s rent.”
Qiao Ling seemed like she had been waiting exactly for this sentence. Upon hearing it, she let out a quiet laugh, then leaned over again, “Hey, Chen Kuang, I want to ask you something.”
Chen Kuang raised his brows, eyes scrutinizing.
“Do you know how to cook?” she asked.
For someone who’s been running back and forth to hospitals for six or seven years, someone who had to take care of home early on, cooking was definitely a necessary skill.
Chen Kuang answered while guessing the purpose behind her words, “Can’t call it culinary skills, just some home-style dishes.”
Qiao Ling nodded, then asked again: “Then do you like doing housework?”
Saying this, Chen Kuang already had an eight- or nine-tenths accurate guess.
He narrowed his eyes—she couldn’t be thinking of…
“I feel like you must be good at housework too. When you work, your bar counter is always so clean.” Qiao Ling, like she had found some big treasure, laid her request bare to him: “You’ve seen it too, I have a lot of stuff, plus I don’t like putting things back in place. The floor also only gets cleaned when it gets dirty.”
“I don’t know how to cook, so I can only order delivery, but that’s unhealthy and expensive.”
She leaned forward slightly, gaze pleading, those pitch-black pupils showing goodwill.
“I won’t charge you rent. Can you help me clean, and… during the day while I’m at work, you sleep, before you go to work in the evening help me make simple dinner, the kind I can eat right when I get home.”
Chen Kuang stared at her mouth that was talking non-stop, his heart a patch of quiet, even feeling like laughing a little.
On the surface it looked like she was offering a discount favor, but in reality, it was a pile of requests more ‘expensive’ than rent.
Same as Qiao Jing, both have potential to be unscrupulous capitalists.
Qiao Ling saw that he completely saw through her little scheme, grabbed the blanket on him with both hands, tugging and shaking it, “Chen Kuang… let’s do it like this, okay?”
She nervously tried the “acting spoiled technique” on him, testing the other party’s bottom line.
“I trust your character. You wouldn’t take advantage of me, right.” she said firmly.
Chen Kuang drooped his eyelids, expression looking like it was saying: But I don’t trust someone who would pull at people’s clothes while they’re asleep.
Qiao Ling somehow understood that: “……”
Already said that time was to cover your belly button.
Time quietly floated by three or four more seconds, he let out a breath again, grabbed the blanket she had been twisting and circling around with one tug—
Qiao Ling didn’t expect it, along with the blanket she was pulled over by him, her pupils enlarging.
She half-knelt on the sofa, raising her head almost bumping into his chin.
Qiao Ling held her breath, facing the man’s extremely close face, lips moving but not managing to say anything.
Her heart was wildly thumping.
Chen Kuang maintained his cross-legged posture, leaned his upper body down, his line of sight gradually filled with her startled gaze.
His brows and eyes calm as ever, enunciating very lightly: “Either way, I’m the one taking advantage.”
“If you have requests for me, just say them anytime. I’ll listen.”
Qiao Ling, trembling with courage, spoke softly and seriously: “Is… anything okay?”
Chen Kuang hooked his lips, emphasizing: “Proper requests.”
She immediately blushed.
Saying it like she was so improper!
Chen Kuang let go of his hand, lifted the blanket and sat up, took another sip of water, pressing down the slight unnaturalness: “If there’s nothing else, I’ll wait until you’re done washing up before I get up and move around.”
“Washing up?” Qiao Ling got up, put on her slippers.
He lifted his eyes, asked: “You’re just going to rest like this?”
She seemed to understand, bent down to grab the key in her hand, letting out a humming laugh: “You’re overthinking it. I’m not sleeping here. These few days I’m going back to my parents’ place.”
Chen Kuang watched her taking the keys and bag, walking farther and farther away, the fingers holding the glass cup secretly turning stiff.
Qiao Ling held onto the shoe cabinet, tilting her head to look over, expression innocent: “I wouldn’t live under the same roof as a sick person. If you pass it to me, that’s game over.”
“My little shop isn’t like your bar with so many employees. It can’t take that kind of trouble.”
She changed her shoes, had already opened the door, then suddenly turned back, whizz whizz whizz, keeping a bit of distance while instructing him: “Oh right, don’t tell my brother you’re living here!”
“Don’t tell anyone, must keep it a secret.”
After saying that, Qiao Ling hurried home, turning around and leaving, bang—closed the door with a swing.
……
The warm, single-person apartment only left the man sitting alone on the sofa.
Falling into silence.
After a long while, Chen Kuang finally moved.
He knocked the glass cup against the coffee table, lowered his head, hooking the corner of his lips, as if laughing at himself.
This kind of feeling of being secretly hidden in the golden house.
What the hell is that supposed to be.