Gao Yuexing followed the stitches on the handkerchief in her memory, completing the crabapple flower. Laying it flat on the embroidery frame, it finally took on the complete appearance she recalled, reflected in her eyes with an astonishing intensity.
Gao Yuemin was startled by her and cried out, “Ah Xing, Ah Xing, what’s wrong with you?”
Gao Yuexing’s heart constricted, her vision darkened, and she suddenly collapsed backward onto the ground.
Her elder sister let out a wailing cry.
The maids and wet nurses serving outside the door rushed in, calling for someone to summon the madam from the other courtyard and hurriedly dispatching others to fetch the household physician.
Gao Yuexing couldn’t utter a single word, her consciousness hazy, as if all the events before were nothing but an illusory dream. Whether the present was reality or fantasy was impossible to discern.
She had no sense of how long she drifted in this stupor, occasionally falling into a high fever, alternating between moments of clarity and confusion.
Occasionally, she overheard her mother’s return and the anxious murmuring of her personal maid—
“Just yesterday, the Noble Consort herself appointed Ah Xing to enter the palace to accompany the princess in her studies. But now she’s fallen ill like this—what are we to do?”
Entering the palace…
Accompanying the princess in her studies…
It was like a light suddenly flickering at the end of a long, dark, and aimless road.
Clinging to her last breath, Gao Yuexing suddenly sat up in shock from her sickbed, startling everyone in the family.
Entering the palace!
That meant she had a chance to meet Li Fuxiang!
The one she had always loved and never stopped longing for.
By calculation, Li Fuxiang should be nine years old this year.
Gao Yuexing vaguely knew that during his youth in the palace, her Highness had endured a difficult period. However, due to the royal family’s secrecy, those who knew the truth were tight-lipped, leaving her with only a limited understanding.
Fortunately, this opportunity to enter the palace had come.
Gao Yuexing clenched the crabapple flower-patterned handkerchief tightly in her hand. She was going to meet her Prince Xiang! The urgency in her heart was overwhelming, and she couldn’t bear to wait another moment.
Madam Gao, her face full of worry and concern, gazed at her with reddened eyes. Her voice carried deep affection and pain as she said, “My precious child, don’t be afraid. If you don’t want to go, I’ll immediately think of a way to inform the Noble Consort… Serving the princess is an unparalleled honor, but it’s also like walking on thin ice—any slight mistake could be disastrous. I don’t expect you to bring glory to the family; I only wish for my child to live a life of peace and happiness.”
Madam Gao misunderstood, thinking her daughter was frightened.
Gao Yuexing felt a pang in her heart. Turning, she threw herself into her mother’s embrace, feeling the luxurious texture of silk embroidered with gold while basking in the long-lost warmth of her mother’s arms. She held back her tears, nestling into her mother’s shoulder, and said, “Mother, I’m not afraid. I’m willing to go!”
Gao Yuexing was deeply troubled by the three years of blank memories.
She couldn’t let go of the matter of the crabapple flower-patterned handkerchief either.
Although Gao Yuexing herself was willing, Madam Gao remained uneasy. After all, her youngest daughter was only six years old this year.
In truth, the selection of companions to study with the princess had been on the Noble Consort’s mind for quite some time.
Initially, the Noble Consort had chosen the eldest daughter of the Gao family, Gao Yuemin, who had just turned ten this year and was close in age to the princess. Their conversations and playfulness were a good match.
But strangely enough, after the imperial decree had already been issued, and after the Noble Consort summoned and met the eldest daughter of the Gao family, she abruptly changed her mind.
At just ten years old, among all the young noble daughters of the capital, none could outshine her radiance.
In her previous life, the world only knew that the Princess Consort of Prince Xiang possessed unparalleled beauty, but they did not know about her elder sister hidden away in the inner chambers, whose stunning elegance was truly breathtaking, capable of making anyone forget the mundane world.
A woman’s beauty is a weapon, especially in the palace.
For a woman as meticulous and thoughtful as the Noble Consort, careful consideration must have led to her concerns.
Gao Yuexing, frail and weak from her long illness, spoke slowly, “Even if we can’t see each other all the time in the future, sister, you must never forget me.”
Gao Yuemin, reluctant to part, promised, “I won’t, ever. I’ll write to you often… You must study hard and learn to read and write, so you can write back and tell me about the interesting things in the palace.”
After speaking just a few words, Gao Yuexing grew faint and sleepy. Stroking her elder sister’s face, she forced a smile and said, “Sister, you’ll surely marry a good husband and live a peaceful and smooth life.”
Gao Yuexing drifted back to sleep, her dreams reversing night and day, morning and evening.
The handkerchief embroidered with crabapple blossoms remained hidden under her pillow.
She often dreamed of a young Li Fuxiang standing far away, gazing at her from a distance. His clear, expressive eyes seemed to speak, filled with anticipation. She stumbled and staggered toward him, but no matter how hard she tried, she could never grasp even the corner of his robe.
He’s waiting for me…
Awakening from her dream in shock once more, her sleepwear soaked with cold sweat, Gao Yuexing thought to herself.
On the day she entered the palace.
Gao Yuexing hid the crabapple handkerchief inside her inner garments.
In the carriage, she nestled in her mother’s arms as the vehicle carried her through the palace gates.
Palace attendants rolled up the curtains and helped them out of the carriage.
Lowering her head, her gaze fixed straight ahead, Gao Yuexing stepped steadily on the green bricks beneath her feet. She knew that along the path to Chunhe Palace, there were exactly sixty-four pomegranate trees and forty-nine forsythia bushes. Even with her eyes closed, she wouldn’t make a misstep.
The lady-in-waiting at Chunhe Palace welcomed them at the entrance.
The Noble Consort, dressed in her finest attire, received them.
Gao Yuexing, with two velvet flowers adorning her hair and wrapped in a lychee-colored cloak, curtsied before the consort.
The Noble Consort warmly pulled her closer for a careful look.
The strict palace rules forbade Gao Yuexing from lifting her head to directly view the consort’s appearance.
She only heard the consort’s gentle, smiling voice from above, “As I recall, your youngest daughter was still such a childlike little thing. It’s only been a few days, and she seems much more composed now.”
Lowering her head, Gao Yuexing listened to this soft voice, imagining the splendor of the Noble Consort in her youth.
The Noble Consort always bore the demeanor of a compassionate goddess.
Madam Gao replied with a smile, “It is her blessing to have gained Your Grace’s favor. She wouldn’t dare act mischievous anymore.”
Though Madam Gao smiled appropriately, it was a forced smile in the face of separation from her flesh and blood.
How could the Noble Consort not sense it? She could only grant more favors and rewards in consolation.
But those had nothing to do with Gao Yuexing anymore.
The Noble Consort bestowed her with a sachet and sent two palace attendants to escort her to pay respects to the princess.
A few days prior, the princess had just celebrated her tenth birthday. Upon hearing that a new playmate was coming, she had been waiting with some anticipation. However, upon meeting her, she saw that the other was merely a child not yet old enough for formal education, and her disappointment was immediate.
A ten-year-old child and a six-year-old child were both racing forward, chasing after time, but they were no longer on the same wavelength and could not play together.
Gao Yuexing bowed to the princess and greeted her.
The princess, named Li Lanyao, graciously helped her up and said, “Now that you’ve entered the palace, we will eat, live, and study together. You don’t have to be so formal. If you lack anything or need anything, just tell me. And if anyone dares to bully you, tell me as well—I will stand up for you…” After speaking for a while, the princess noticed that Gao Yuexing had a blank, faraway look, as though her mind was wandering. Sighing in frustration, the princess added, “Forget it. You’re so young; what could you possibly understand?”
Gao Yuexing’s father was the Minister of the Court of Justice.
Even with such an esteemed status, once inside the palace, they were all mere servants, subject to the whims and favor of their superiors.
The princess asked, “Do you know how to read?”
Gao Yuexing shook her head.
At six years old, she was still just a child, and for now, she could only behave like one. She was well-versed in palace survival—if she wanted to stay safe, she couldn’t stand out too much.
The princess asked again, “Can you recite texts?”
Gao Yuexing replied, “The Three Character Classic, Hundred Family Surnames, and Thousand Character Classic.” She deliberately picked the simplest ones and recited a short passage.
The princess’s expression finally brightened.
Although these were simple works, it was a relief that she wasn’t dull—she could be taught.
The princess instructed her personal attendant to arrange for Gao Yuexing’s accommodations.
In truth, these trivial matters didn’t require the princess’s involvement; the Noble Consort had already arranged everything.
Following the attendant, Gao Yuexing took a brief tour of the warm chamber in the side hall.
The princess’s personal attendant, Aunt Wei, had a cold and aloof demeanor. She was taciturn and difficult to approach, her scrutinizing gaze often sweeping over Gao Yuexing with an air of appraisal.
Gao Yuexing remained composed.
After all, in her past life, she had been the highly esteemed Crown Princess—how could an old attendant intimidate her?
In the warm chamber, all her provisions were allocated according to the standards for royal relatives, an extraordinary level of generosity.
After settling her in, Aunt Wei happened to catch the meal hour.
The princess pulled Gao Yuexing along excitedly, saying, “Your timing is perfect. We can have lunch together, and in the afternoon, we can go to the training grounds to watch my royal brother practice horseback riding and archery.”
Horseback riding and archery?
For the first time, Gao Yuexing’s calm and steady heart rippled with anticipation.
Gentlemen of noble families practiced the Six Arts. By tradition, princes were supposed to begin training with their instructors at the training grounds from the age of eight.
Gao Yuexing mentally calculated—Li Fuxiang’s age should be about right. She wondered if she would see him this time.
The current emperor had few offspring. Beneath him, there was only one princess, and only two princes who had survived to adulthood:
—The eldest son, Li Fuqian, and the youngest son, Li Fuxiang.
Li Fuxiang, ranked fifth among the royal siblings, was only a year younger than the princess.
Looking further back, the second and third princes had both passed away before reaching the age of thirty.
Gao Yuexing weighed her thoughts carefully and decided it was better to ask directly.
So, after lunch, she inquired, “I’ve heard there is a Fifth Prince in the palace, but he rarely appears before others. I’ve never seen him.”
The princess’s expression changed.
Aunt Wei, her face impassive, dismissed the attending palace servants to a distance of ten paces.
Only then did the princess furrow her brows slightly and say, “Don’t mention the Fifth Prince. It’s taboo. Father doesn’t like him, and neither does my mother.”
Gao Yuexing realized she had been too hasty.
Returning to the warm chamber, the princess softened her tone and solemnly instructed her, “From now on, you are one of my people. Our honor and disgrace are intertwined. Some things I’ll only tell you, and you must understand them yourself. Keep them in your heart, and never speak of them to outsiders.”
Gao Yuexing nodded obediently.
Thus, she learned some secrets—secrets that had puzzled her in her previous life but had never been clarified.
The princess began, “Once, there was an Imperial Noble Consort Zheng in the palace. Now, few dare to speak of her. You’re too young to know these things…”
At six years old, Gao Yuexing indeed did not understand.
But as someone who had been the Princess Consort of Prince Xiang for four years, she knew.
Imperial Noble Consort Zheng had been the emperor’s most beloved. Tragically, her life was short, and she passed away early. After her death, she was posthumously honored as empress and buried in the imperial mausoleum.
The emperor’s intentions were clear: to share the same tomb with Imperial Noble Consort Zheng in life and death. Even her burial arrangements followed the specifications for a joint imperial tomb.
The princess, though young, spoke with measured restraint, offering only this: “Imperial Consort Zheng died in childbirth. Before she passed, the one serving her was the Fifth Prince’s birth mother, Lady Xu…” Then, seeing Gao Yuexing’s puzzled look, she leaned closer and whispered, “After Imperial Consort Zheng’s death, Lady Xu fell out of favor with the emperor. Not long after, the Fifth Prince was born, and he too suffered Father’s rejection. I suppose he blamed Lady Xu for failing to care for Imperial Consort Zheng properly.”
The princess sighed.
Gao Yuexing thought of the Li Fuxiang she remembered from her past life, riding through the capital, admiring the flowers of Chang’an, showered with imperial favor, and basking in the glory of his royal lineage.
Even her father had once remarked with awe, “If the emperor has ten measures of favor, he gives twelve to Prince Xiang.”
Who would have thought that in his youth, he had been so despised by the emperor?
Gao Yuexing’s thoughts revolved entirely around her young prince. She endured the hours until after lunch when the princess took a short nap. Sitting on the threshold of the hall, she rested her cheeks in her hands, gazing at the towering palace walls and the blindingly white sun. Her eyes no longer held the innocence and clarity of a child but were instead dark, inscrutable, and devoid of worldly attachment.
The palace servants moved silently, not daring to disturb her.
Aunt Wei’s robes fluttered as she passed through the corridors. Without waiting for anyone to announce her presence, she entered the Noble Consort’s main hall.