Chunxing rambled on incoherently, saying a lot of nonsensical things. At first, You Yuji couldn’t understand what she was talking about. But after listening for a while, You Yuji carefully pondered and slowly pieced together an incomplete story.
Chunxing had once thought she would take the secret about Wangjiang to her grave. But now that she no longer feared death, she had no more concerns. She blurted out all those fragmented words as if emptying her heart, feeling an inexplicable lightness.
After a long silence, You Yuji gently stroked the abrasions on Chunxing’s hand with her thumb and said softly, “Since you’ve been rescued, it must be fate.”
Chunxing stared blankly at the ceiling, her eyes full of tears. She knew You Yuji was advising her not to dwell on it, but with Wangjiang gone, the strength that had kept her barely alive was gone too.
You Yuji observed her expression, remained silent for a while, and then asked, “Does he have any family?”
Chunxing shook her head. “A few years ago, someone from his hometown sent him a letter, but his only grandfather is gone now.”
“If you were gone too, there would be no one left in this world to remember him. The traces of his life would quickly be erased.”
A hint of change appeared in Chunxing’s vacant eyes. She turned her head and looked at You Yuji in confusion.
“Everyone seeks something in life. He must have had unfulfilled regrets. Don’t you want to help him complete what he couldn’t?” You Yuji asked gently.
Chunxing fell into a deep contemplation and remained silent for a long time.
You Yuji tenderly wiped away the tears streaming from her eyes and said softly, “Everyone has their own path to walk. I can’t help you much and can’t always be there for you. But if you want to leave the Jinnan Prince’s Residence, I can help you with that.”
You Yuji touched Chunxing’s forehead with the back of her hand, felt that her fever had subsided, and withdrew her hand.
“Get some good sleep. If there’s anything you can’t figure out, think about it after you’ve had enough rest.” You Yuji tucked her in and said, “Sleep well.”
Knowing that Chunxing might have trouble falling asleep, You Yuji didn’t wait for her to sleep before leaving. She stood up and left first.
After leaving the small courtyard, You Yuji hesitated for a moment. Instead of returning directly to Tanxiang Yingyue, she first went to the princess’s residence. She had promised the princess to consider her proposal and should give her an answer.
Upon seeing You Yuji, the usually stern Gu Momo immediately put on a smile and personally lifted the curtain, saying, “The princess was just thinking about you, Madam!”
“Is there something she needs to ask me?” You Yuji inquired.
“No, it’s just that some tribute silks and a large piece of purple jade arrived from the palace. The princess saw the jade and immediately thought of you, Madam, and thought it would be wonderful to have a skilled craftsman make a set of jade ornaments for you! The princess was just about to send someone to deliver it to you.”
You Yuji noticed the change in Gu Momo’s attitude towards her. While listening to her, she had already walked into the room. The princess was sitting on the bed, drinking medicine. Upon seeing You Yuji, she immediately put down the medicine and forced a smile, saying, “Come and sit.”
You Yuji quickly walked over and sat down by the bed, saying, “Princess, please finish your medicine first.”
The princess nodded and picked up the medicine. There was not much left in the bowl. She frowned and drank it all in one gulp, then handed the empty bowl to the maid.
You Yuji picked up a small dish of candied fruits and handed it to the princess. The princess took one to ease the bitterness in her mouth. After the bitterness subsided a bit, she sighed lightly and looked down at her belly, lamenting, “I don’t even know if I can keep this child…”
You Yuji followed the princess’s gaze.
She had initially taken an interest in the princess’s affairs largely because of the unborn child. She had never been able to conceive and thought that by accumulating good deeds and virtue, perhaps the little star in the princess’s belly would call upon another star in the heavens to come to her.
“Princess, don’t think too much. Anxiety is not good for your injury or the baby,” You Yuji advised softly.
The princess forced herself to cheer up and nodded. She asked, “Have you given it some thought?”
“I know you mean well, to save me from being slandered and bullied in the capital,” You Yuji said slowly. “But after much consideration, I find the matter of becoming an adopted daughter quite troublesome. If in the future I am in difficulty and seek the princess’s help, I would be most grateful for any assistance. There’s no need to go through such a complicated process.”
Hearing You Yuji’s words, the princess knew she was being gently refused. Sometimes, the princess wondered why You Yuji was so decisive in her actions, seemingly unconcerned about potential future troubles. But since You Yuji had already made her decision, the princess could only nod reluctantly and not insist further.
A maid hurried in and whispered a few words into Gu Momo’s ear. The princess noticed and frowned, asking, “What is it now?”
Gu Momo hesitated for a moment before reporting the situation.
It turned out that Chen Lingyan had run to Chen Anzhi and started a big commotion, crying and complaining that Chen Anzhi’s mishandling of his domestic affairs had brought misfortune upon their family.
The princess sighed but said nothing and did not instruct Gu Momo to intervene. Naturally, she blamed Chen Anzhi, but Chen Lingyan also made her heart sink. Since the incident happened, her daughter had not once come to visit her.
You Yuji observed the princess’s expression and resolved that she must educate her children well in the future to avoid repeating the princess’s mistakes. Then she thought, where are her own children? You Yuji pressed her lips together, her eyes flickering with a trace of sadness.
—
Chen Anzhi was drenched in sweat from the pain of his burnt hands when Chen Lingyan burst in.
Chen Anzhi took a deep breath to endure the pain in his hands and had Wangshan help him sit up. He frowned and looked at Chen Lingyan, worriedly asking, “Lingyan, how is the injury on your chin? Does it hurt?”
He looked at Chen Lingyan’s chin, but the bandage covering her wound made it impossible to see the injury.
“Why are you pretending to care?” Chen Lingyan’s reddened eyes glared roundly. “If it weren’t for you, would I be injured?”
Chen Anzhi was at a loss for words. He opened his mouth and, after a long moment, said guiltily, “It’s my fault for implicating you and Mother.”
Chen Lingyan had intended to argue, but Chen Anzhi’s immediate admission of guilt only made her angrier. She stomped her foot hard and lashed out, “Do you think guilt or apologies are useful? Look at how pathetic you are!”
Chen Anzhi looked up in shock at the furious Chen Lingyan, hardly believing his ears. Did he hear correctly? His always obedient and cheerful sister was actually pointing at his nose and calling him pathetic?
Was this really his once sweet and smiling little sister?
“What kind of expression is that?” Chen Lingyan put one hand on her hip and pointed at Chen Anzhi with the other. “Do you think you’re so great? You were just lucky to be born to Mother. Who doesn’t say behind your back that you’re good for nothing except for your pretty face?”
“Lingyan…”
“Did I say anything wrong? Look at how you’ve angered Father and Mother! How do you compare to any of our cousins? All of them are heirs, but who else is as foolish and useless as you?” The more Chen Lingyan spoke, the more her chin hurt, burning with pain. The more the wound hurt, the more aggrieved she felt, and tears streamed down her face.
“You think you’re so clever, but you were played like a fool by that wench Fang Qingyi! Serves you right!”
Chen Anzhi’s pale face flushed with color, and his hand, propped up on the bed, slowly clenched. Fang Qingyi was a thorn in his heart, constantly reminding him of his foolishness, and now Chen Lingyan brought her up.
He couldn’t help but retort, “Weren’t you also deceived by her…”
Chen Lingyan had felt she had said too many harsh things and was about to turn and leave when she heard Chen Anzhi’s words. Her sense of grievance flared up again. She stomped her foot hard and knocked over a set of tea utensils on the table.
She rushed up to Chen Anzhi, her finger almost touching his nose.
“Do you know what people outside are saying about you? They all say that Prince Jinnan’s lifelong honor will be ruined by you. You are Father’s greatest disgrace!”
“You’ve been acting strangely ever since you saw Princess Que that year. You treat this woman as a substitute, and that woman as a shadow! As a dignified heir, you could live a good life, but you insist on making yourself miserable! Yes, I look down on those prairie women from Si Kingdom. But you believe every word that crazy Fang Qingyi says. She says You Yuji and Zhao Sheng are having an affair, and you believe it without any verification! Well, now she wants a divorce from you! They call it a ‘he li,’ but let’s be honest, a ‘He Li’ is just a woman dismissing a man!”
“As a noble heir, you’re being dismissed by a prairie woman. Aren’t you ashamed?”
Chen Anzhi listened to Chen Lingyan’s words in a daze. His face, red at first, turned deathly pale again. Her accusations echoed in his ears, yet they seemed distant.
That day, Fang Qingyi’s accusing face gradually overlapped with Chen Lingyan’s.
Could it be that they were both telling the truth?
Was he really that despicable?
The esteemed heir, once faced with adversity, was now deeply struck, sinking into a whirlpool of self-doubt. He began to question himself, wondering if his past self had been nothing but a joke.
Tears fell, but he couldn’t tell if they were from regret, shame, or an inability to accept his true self.
Two days later, Chen Anzhi could barely get out of bed and, with Wangshan’s help, went to the princess’s courtyard. He was concerned about his mother’s health and wanted to visit her.
Gu Momo stood on the stone steps under the eaves, her face stern. “The princess has already retired. She has instructed not to be disturbed. Heir, you should return.”
Chen Anzhi, pale and in pain, which caused his abdominal wound to bleed again, was still turned away. He looked past Gu Momo and asked, “Gu Momo, how is my mother’s injury? Is the baby in her womb alright?”
Gu Momo, seeing Chen Anzhi’s paper-white face, couldn’t help but feel pity. She sighed softly and said, “The princess is being looked after by the imperial physician. Heir, please return.”
Wangshan also advised, “Sir, let’s go back. The wind is strong outside, and you shouldn’t be exposed to it for long.”
Chen Anzhi removed his hand from Wangshan’s shoulder, took two steps back, and knelt in front of the tightly closed door.
Gu Momo hurriedly stepped aside to avoid him.
Chen Anzhi earnestly kowtowed three times.
He swayed and couldn’t stand up on his own. Wangshan quickly went over to help him up and supported him as they walked back.
“Go…” Chen Anzhi hesitated for a moment, “to Tanxiang Yingyue.”
Chen Anzhi’s residence was not far from the princess’s place, and he barely managed to walk there. However, Tanxiang Yingyue was farther away, and it took him a long time to reach it.
When Chen Anzhi arrived at Tanxiang Yingyue, he was stunned by the scene in the courtyard.
The aroma of roast lamb filled the air, as two maidservants laughed and chatted while sprinkling spices on the lamb. Nearby, two other maidservants were squatting and removing the clay from a beggar’s chicken.
Cuiyu and Hongzan, along with two maidservants, were playing dominoes. Two more maidservants stood behind them, learning how to play.
You Yuji sat comfortably in a wicker chair, a completely black cat on her lap. She was enjoying the sunshine while grooming the cat’s fur.
Chunxing was also there. She sat quietly next to You Yuji, watching her groom Baisui’s fur in a daze.
Everyone in the courtyard wore brightly colored new clothes, with smiles on their faces, creating a festive atmosphere. This scene was in stark contrast to the cold and desolate place where Chen Anzhi was.
Chen Anzhi suddenly realized that no one around him wore white anymore to suit his preferences.
Si Que emerged from the house, holding his qin.
He, too, was dressed in red.
