However, Lu Chengsha seemed very certain, leaving Hua Yan unsure.
If only she had asked You Weitian more questions earlier!
How many times did it take to solve this?
In that moment of hesitation, his lips pressed down on hers, bringing a hot, breathless warmth that made her heart race. It was still winter, yet both of them were covered in sweat. Drops of sweat continuously fell from the tip of Lu Chengsha’s nose and the corners of his forehead, making it seem as if he had just been pulled out of water—although he indeed was. His expression was a subtle mix of distress and pleasure, causing Hua Yan’s heart to beat even faster, filled with a peculiar sense of excitement and infatuation.
After all, he was like this because of her.
But soon, she had no time to think about this.
He learned quickly without a teacher. Hua Yan soon felt overwhelmed again, drenched in sweat, her toes stretched out with no place to rest, then she was lifted up.
Hua Yan: “…???”
I don’t allow you to be this skilled.
Perhaps her eyes were too wide open, and Lu Chengsha, amidst his busy actions, briefly explained, “Just now, in the book.”
Weren’t you too shy to look?
Wait, how much did you actually see?
Lu Chengsha quickly demonstrated how much he had seen. He had indeed only glanced at a few pages, but those scenes had imprinted entirely in his mind—his memory was exceptionally good.
Hua Yan felt like a small boat, floating and sinking uncontrollably, especially when Lu Chengsha held her, as if her weight didn’t exist.
Her hairpins fell, her long black hair scattered messily, sometimes spreading out beneath her, sometimes falling on her back, and occasionally tossed into the air, drawing captivating arcs before gently covering her shoulders.
Hua Yan was shaking.
The bed was shaking too.
Hua Yan hadn’t expected the second time detoxifying to be even more exhausting than the first. The red candle had burned out, leaving the light ambiguous and unclear. Being underground, they couldn’t distinguish between day and night, and apart from the sounds they made, nothing else could be heard, as if the world only contained the two of them.
She whimpered, leaning on Lu Chengsha’s shoulder, wanting to bite him.
But as she opened her mouth and leaned in, she found herself reluctant.
In the end, she left only a shallow bite mark before Lu Chengsha pulled her consciousness away again. She felt as if she was sinking into a dream, her mind hazy and ambiguous, faintly feeling herself trembling.
After some unknown time, Lu Chengsha seemed to finally grow a conscience and softly asked her, “…Is it very tiring?”
Hua Yan couldn’t help but nod.
Lu Chengsha was stunned and then asked, “…Is it very uncomfortable?”
Hua Yan paused. It wasn’t that bad; there were parts that felt good. But doing it continuously like this was truly exhausting for her. Wasn’t he tired at all?
She remained silent, and Lu Chengsha took it as an implicit agreement.
“Sorry.” He held her gently, his fingers stroking her soft long hair, just as he usually did to comfort her. However, his fingertips occasionally touched her smooth back, sending tiny shivers through Hua Yan. Then she heard Lu Chengsha say, “…I’ll be quicker.”
Hua Yan didn’t realize what he meant at first.
Suddenly, she let out a sharp scream, her ten slender fingers digging into his shoulders, her face flushed as if it would bleed, feeling like her soul was about to scatter.
She even wanted to escape but was pressed back by Lu Chengsha.
“Very soon,” he said softly.
Liar! It wasn’t fast at all!
Hua Yan almost wanted to poke his chest and scold him angrily.
However, looking back, she couldn’t form coherent words during that experience. She could only turn her head away, biting her teeth, feeling like fireworks were exploding one after another before her eyes, a burst of white light.
Finally, Lu Chengsha calmed down.
Hua Yan lay beside him, taking quite a while to recover. When she came to her senses, she touched her face and found it wet. Lu Chengsha noticed too, his expression like someone who had done something wrong, anxiously wanting to wipe her tears, but his hand hovered in the air, as if embarrassed.
She had been a bit upset, but seeing his reaction, she couldn’t stay angry.
Hua Yan muttered to herself for a moment, then reached out her arms. Lu Chengsha understood and gently embraced her, more tenderly and carefully than ever before.
She nestled her head into the crook of his shoulder, nuzzling affectionately and said, “…Now the poison should be completely cured, right? I really don’t have the strength to do this again.”
Lu Chengsha murmured an affirmative. Hua Yan turned her head but suddenly noticed something off about his expression.
She immediately pulled away a bit, looking at him warily and said, “…You can’t be serious!” She then reached out to check his pulse, examining him slightly.
After a moment, she looked up angrily and said, “You were cured long ago!”
Lu Chengsha looked slightly confused and said, “Cured? But I…”
Hua Yan glanced down.
This time, Lu Chengsha didn’t stop her.
Hua Yan’s expression was complicated; she was truly too weak to move… How could this be reasonable, after such a short time? Yet under her gaze, it seemed even more vigorous.
Lu Chengsha picked up his underwear and put it on, then started to don his inner garment. Hua Yan couldn’t help but ask, “…Is it really okay?”
He paused and said, “…Not poisoned, it will be fine soon.” His voice was a bit deeper, as if fearing she wouldn’t believe him, he added, “It’s always like this.”
Hua Yan asked, “Always?”
Lu Chengsha lowered his gaze slightly and said, “When I’m close to you.”
Hua Yan blinked, her face inexplicably heating up. She gently tugged on Lu Chengsha’s hair and asked, “Is it really okay…?”
Lu Chengsha nodded, “Mm.”
Although his face was still a bit red, he seemed to have returned to his usual state, unlike earlier, when his desire seemed as if it would devour her. She still bore the marks of his grip on her body.
Feeling both shy and curious, Hua Yan hesitated, “…Just now, you…”
Lu Chengsha already knew what she wanted to ask.
He lowered his head a bit more, unsure if he should say it, but finally he uttered four words: “…Engraved in the bones.”
Hua Yan was shocked. How did he even know such a term? She couldn’t help but cover her face.
Previously, she often dreamt that Lu Chengsha found out her true identity and stabbed her with a sword. Now, she had indeed been stabbed by his “sword.”
Stop—don’t think about it anymore, Hua Yan thought, covering her face.
Lu Chengsha wasn’t sure if he had used the right words, but those were the only ones that had come to his mind.
His cheeks were also a bit flushed.
In fact, he couldn’t stop recalling everything that had just happened—every detail, including her subtle expressions and reactions, and that indescribable, almost world-shattering experience. It left Lu Chengsha in a daze, wondering how such a thing could exist in the world…
Due to his previously limited understanding, he almost felt guilty.
Everything seemed illusory and unreal, yet the pleasure of being lost in it was so intense that it made his scalp tingle. He was left with an uncontrollable instinct, craving more and more joy.
He knew he shouldn’t, but he couldn’t bring himself to stop.
In the end, he really made her cry.
Lu Chengsha felt regret, even starting to reflect on himself. Though it was to detoxify, he shouldn’t have completely lost his rationality. He could have been gentler; he didn’t have to make her cry. And when she cried, he felt like he was truly acting like in his dreams…
This shouldn’t be.
How could he be such a person?
Hua Yan calmed down and noticed him suddenly freezing up. She tugged at him again and said, “Great Hero Lu…” Suddenly, she realized something was off and blushed, saying, “Our relationship is a bit different now, isn’t it? Calling you ‘Great Hero Lu’ might be a bit strange.”
Lu Chengsha came back to his senses, and hearing her words, his face also reddened a little.
He softly said, “…You can call me whatever you like.”
Hua Yan’s mind raced through all the endearing names her mother used to call her father, but when it came to actually saying them, she felt too embarrassed. She tidied her messy long hair and said, “…Calling you Chengsha? No, your family members call you that!” She didn’t want to be like them!
She looked up at him again and tentatively said, “Sha Sha?”
At first, hearing that name felt odd—who would use the character “杀 (kill)” in someone’s name? But upon meeting him, she felt the name suited him well, and over time, even the character seemed to grow endearing.
Lu Chengsha paused, then nodded and said, “Mm.”
Hua Yan immediately felt like hugging and kissing him; he was too adorable!
Lu Chengsha quietly accepted the new nickname, not finding it strange at all. Seeing her eyes light up as if she was about to come over, he took a step back and turned to get dressed.
But as he turned, Hua Yan suddenly noticed numerous crisscrossing scars on his back. The scars densely covered his back, with some areas faintly showing blood.
She was stunned and almost exclaimed, “What happened to your back!”
The lighting had been poor earlier, and she hadn’t had the chance to see Lu Chengsha’s back until now.
Lu Chengsha’s movements paused, then he quickly put on his inner garment and said, “It’s nothing.”
His inner garment was already stained with blood.
How could this be nothing!
Hua Yan immediately said, “Take off your clothes and let me have a look!”
Lu Chengsha stood still, hesitant.
Hua Yan, exasperated, said, “Hurry up! Or I’ll come over and take them off myself!”
Lu Chengsha had no choice but to take off his inner garment and come over. Hua Yan carefully examined the scars on his back, feeling more distressed by the sight. These were clearly all new injuries, with bruises not yet fully healed. Her heart ached for him—she would make a fuss over a single scratch on her shoulder, but this fool had such severe injuries on his back and hadn’t said a word!
She was furious!
Hua Yan gently traced the scars with her fingertips. She had finally touched Lu Chengsha’s scars, but it brought her no joy. Lu Chengsha trembled slightly, and Hua Yan quickly asked, “Does it hurt?”
Lu Chengsha shook his head, “It doesn’t hurt.”
Hua Yan insisted, “Don’t lie to me!”
After a moment of silence, Lu Chengsha said, “It doesn’t hurt now, but it did a bit at the time.”
Hua Yan remembered him saying before that he could endure pain and get used to it, but now even he admitted it hurt, so it must have been very painful. Feeling even more heartbroken, she couldn’t help but ask, though she already had a suspicion, “How did you get these injuries…”
Lu Chengsha replied casually, “My grandfather punished me.”
Hua Yan asked, “Why did he punish you?”
Lu Chengsha remained silent.
Hua Yan blurted out, “Is it because of me? But you didn’t know before. At that time, I was hiding it from you. Why would he punish you for that?”
After a moment of silence, Lu Chengsha said, “Now he knows.”
For a moment, even Hua Yan was at a loss for words.
Her nose felt sour, a wave of grievance rising within her, but there was no outlet for it.
In this world of just the two of them, they could temporarily forget their differences in status, but what about when they went back outside?
Lu Chengsha put on his inner garment, covering the scars on his back, and seemed to try to comfort her, “It really doesn’t hurt anymore.”
Hua Yan couldn’t help but look up at him, her eyes slightly red, “…What if he continues to punish you in the future?”
Lu Chengsha had no answer for her.
He picked up her inner garment, clumsily helping her put it on.
Hua Yan grasped her clothes, bit her lip, and looked up at Lu Chengsha. His face showed no extra emotion, as if he wasn’t worried, or perhaps he had chosen to face whatever came his way with calm acceptance.
An indescribable sadness welled up inside her.
She needed comfort.
Unable to help herself, Hua Yan reached out, causing Lu Chengsha to pause and lower his head. They kissed quietly for a while.
Her breathing became irregular, her arms still wrapped around him, their heads touching, and Lu Chengsha’s eyelashes almost brushing her face. Hua Yan took a deep breath and said, “Could you… leave Tingjian Manor?”
Lu Chengsha didn’t want to disappoint her, but there were some things he couldn’t be vague about.
He answered seriously, “No.”
The answer was not unexpected.
Hua Yan knew that if he left Tingjian Manor, he would have nowhere to go. Maybe Xie Yingxian wouldn’t mind him joining the Zhengyi Sect, but he had killed too many people from the Demon Sect, and there would be resistance. Besides, he himself would never agree to it; once he left, he would become a traitor to the righteous path.
She pouted.
Lu Chengsha didn’t know how to comfort her.
He hadn’t originally expected things to turn out this way. Over the past three months, he had been clear-headed enough to remind himself that she was from the Demon Sect. Whether her feelings were genuine or not, they shouldn’t have any further contact.
They should be strangers, or at least keep their distance.
But seeing her again, he realized it was impossible.
Even without the poisoning, his feelings were about to overflow.
The moment he laid her down on the bed, he knew he was already destined for eternal damnation.
The surroundings were still dimly lit, with only a few isolated lamps casting light. The room was silent and secluded, cut off from the outside world. But no matter what, this moment belonged to them.
Hua Yan suddenly looked up and said, “We…”
Lu Chengsha responded, “Hm?”
Hua Yan bit her lip, then shed the garment she had just put on and said, “…Let’s do it again!”
Lu Chengsha: “…!”
His Adam’s apple bobbed up and down rapidly, as if he was torn and struggling.
Hua Yan asked suspiciously, “Do you not want to?”
Lu Chengsha answered quickly, “It’s not that, it’s just…” he feared she couldn’t handle it.
But his actions had already moved ahead of his thoughts. He climbed back onto the bed and kissed her deeply again.
This time, Hua Yan was truly exhausted by the end, unable to lift her arms. Her body felt limp and her eyelids heavy.
Lu Chengsha seemed to sense something, his movements especially gentle and prolonged. His kisses were continuous, and Hua Yan felt a touch of “till death do us part,” as if he could go on forever.
As if this moment of pleasure was stolen.
Hua Yan didn’t have the energy to marvel at Lu Chengsha’s extraordinary talent. She felt a mix of self-destruction and willing surrender. As she was turned over and over again, the thin, crimson canopy was pulled down by her fingers, mingling with their sounds of passion.
When she finally fell asleep, she clung to Lu Chengsha’s hand, not wanting to let go.
Sleepily, she murmured, “Don’t go.”
Lu Chengsha replied, “Mm.”
Afterward, Hua Yan fell into a deep and steady sleep. Lu Chengsha pulled the thin quilt that had been swept aside earlier and gently covered her with it. He leaned beside her, unable to resist quietly pulling her closer, though he was afraid of waking her. However, his worries were unfounded; Hua Yan slept very deeply, her eyelashes not even fluttering.
The dim light cast a soft halo over her face, dreamlike and ethereal.
This dream had yet to end.
Lu Chengsha closed his eyes but couldn’t help but open them again to look at her, unable to tear his gaze away.
Eventually, he leaned down, gently brushing her hair aside with his fingertips. He kissed her forehead delicately, as if she were a fragile treasure.
Just this simple action brought him immense satisfaction.
He carefully savored his feelings at that moment, a complex mix of emotions, each one unfamiliar. They were sensations Lu Chengsha had never experienced in his twenty-some years, and trying to piece them together brought a sense of near-desperate helplessness and willing surrender.